不要忘记。

我开始了解，记忆是不会随着时间的流失而退色或遗失的。
时间越久，它便埋得越深，跟随你也就越久…

由其是那些美丽的…
甜甜，却也涩涩的…

[ 今年，你也和我一样，为自己的人生收集了美丽的记忆吗？］

Are We Sick?

According to the latest survey findings on Asia's annoyances study, we surprisingly rank right at the bottom amongst 8 other Asian countries! Which means among all countries being survey, our people are the least likely to flare up or show our annoyances in public.
Another surprise, the land of a thousand smiles actually came in top! Such an irony.. But come to think of it, doesn't it also says that we Singaporeans like to suppress our feelings, to the extent of detrimenting our mental and emotional health?
And it is not without proof, we do have a very high rate of teenagers succumbing to depression and seeking counselling help in yet another survey. Hmm.. not a good news at all. Are we actually sick?

[ Wish one and all good health mentally & physically in 2006! ]

The Emotion Quotient.

High EQ?! Horror!

i dun think so, I rather chose to believe I have a much higher IQ than EQ..
Took the official IQ test before and I scored 117 points. I scored pretty decent for my intelligence.
EQ-wise, I suppose i would score miserably. Being someone who feels happy and sad so easily, cries when happy or touched, I often allow the drama & comedy of those around me and even total strangers get to me. As such, can I still have an high EQ? Well maybe I do. Being mature at a premature age of 10, I have always been aware of my weakness since a kiddo. I could have unconsciously strived to keep my swaying emotions in check. Have I become cold & distant in the process? I hope not. I am warm & wacky down inside, but cool & collected on the facade. Oh and I do admit I can survive happily in silence & solitude for a prolonged period. I'm typically a pisces, am I not? :P
I have side-tracked. Well EQ, I don't mind not to do very well in this area. Laugh & cry without restraint. Show the angst when you have it boiling inside. Life is simpler this way. Oh my, I dun really have much emotions to display really..

I will try the EQ test soon!




[ Come 2006, I will continue to suscribe to my own brand of ciieliness :) ]


Feb28 Update:
Ha i received this email from the site that i took the IQ test exactly a year ago to review my results...ohh...my score was actually 126 at that time..& i was classified as an Inspired Inventor! phew...my job is one of the recommended few for my intelligence type :D
http://web.tickle.com/tests/uiq/paidresult.jsp

爱缺。

说到爱人与被爱之间，
朋友说：
“亲情永远比爱情来得踏实些，
可是要等爱情升华成亲情，
那是需要多少在一起的时间和经历
才能到得了的。”
我完全同意。
我在想：
“不知道这辈子等得到吗？”
但我又说了：
“anyway, 我选择去爱人。
曾经读过：
一个人过完一生，有什么不可以？！
但是，要爱过哟！
如果被爱是种奢侈的等待，
何不好好去爱？"
谈何容易？
先去爱人然后得以被爱，
幸福美满。
爱了半生却不被爱，
谁能说是无所谓？
都说只有父母给予子女的爱是unconditional love.
爱人与被爱本来就是一辈子得学习的一门学问。

[ 又一年了，我们该认真学习了吧？]

花开了。

“ 身为一道彩虹，
尽全力也要换你一些笑容。”
不管雨再滂沱，
有些事情，不必人懂，
只要你懂。

[ 花开了吗？]

第3篇。

用感激去证明无知中的无悔。
用成全去遗忘曾哭泣的天空。
用时间去灌溉再出发的决心。
用坚持去兑现不放弃的追逐。
用喜悦去期待生命中的下道彩虹。

[ 希望，是在最绝望时的唯一曙光。]

The Happy Loser.

Being awfully mortal, I have been either an avid procrastinator or I sometimes chose to be lazy even when I have a little bit of time, using tiredness as the lame'ol excuse. It takes a huge dose of pills at a critical time of the year to wake me up to my senses that I ought to gather my so called zest & energy that should rightfully belong to an average 25year old 'YOUNG LASS', even if I've always deemed myself less than average.
Being sick made me feel tired, lazy, stupid, slow, useless, breathless, old, weak and numb. During those days, I started to dread each day as I began to feel my life is getting pointless and aimless. I don't know what I should put my focal point on. I felt anxious and at the same time not doing anything to remedy. I felt miserable as I knew I'm expressionless. I was disconnected from myself. Very well that this was not the first time my life is hitting the rocks and I knew exactly how to rescue myself at the end of the ordeal.
Unfortunately there's no short cut and I just have to go through the motion and pray for myself that the bottom is near in order to start emerging. I can't say this is another crisis of mine, just a mini adventure at the close of another year. ")
Over my 20 years of experience in this area, I think I am quite a good self-taught aunt agony by now. :P The 'pros & the gurus' usually will tell you to fill your life with all sorts of activities whenever a patient says he feels lost. But depending on the degree of lost, I think that is sometimes a distraction or even a confusion and not a solution. At least personally, now. I have enuff things on my plate, trvial ones they may be but who says it takes passing your driving, losing 10kilos, earning a new cert, switching to a new job, promoted to house owner, being ATTACheD or other milestones-lookalike to qualify being happy and meaningful in life?
Happiness is a state of mind. I know I'm typically one who weighs myself with too much expectations and unduly worries. But I know equally well too that for myself, being on time for work, knocking off before sunset, finishing up on my spring cleaning, finishing my half-read books and having something to smile at everyday, be it something, someone, a thought, an image, a joke, a conversation, a flower or a compliment, are counted as achievements, which I'm still working at. No doubt I'm not an ambitious person, please don't mistook a dreamer as a non-serious being. Some people are meant for something BIG in their lives, but not all. Being a late-bloomer for all things in life, I am content with taking life in my own pace as long as I can continually battle the stresses from outside that periodically puts me down. It does sound sad that I have to go thru the cycles of sinking, drowning, hitting, bouncing and lifting again and again infinitely. But if thats my life lesson I have to take I will accept and get on with it. It doesn't mean I'm resigning to fate. Fight only when there's a reason to fight for. I don't believe in winning every race. Learn to be a happy loser ;)

[ I am a fish. I sink. I drown. I hit. I bounce. I lift. I'm sad 100%…then happy again. 200% ]

Take It Out Under the Sun.

Time: 6.01pm.
Location: Bedroom Huge Desk Facing the Window.
Activity: Finger Workout on my STATIONCIIE*.
Mood: Irritably Excitable.
Energy Tank: Two Third Full.

Dear Journal,
I've been in between illnesses for the past 3 weeks and I've been out of sorts, sort of.
OH dear, I've been filling pages of you with gloomy tales and even have the cheek to submit some of them to meet my BLOG deadlines. Everywhere is splattered with black and grey and murky blue, can't stand it! Why did you allow me that?! Ok, nvm.
Guess what? Today I'm back so early! So rare to still see the sun when I reached home. And I mean evening sun. Afternoon sun usually means I'm off prematurely with a certificate from the sinseh, so no thanks. Anyway I always love sUnrise & sUnset.
Albeit a little tired after my long battle of 'designer against advertiser', my spirits just soared when I saw the playful sunshine playing with the shadows of the trees and everything! So excited I just have to take my camera out! Hey, just downstairs my flats can have nice things to capture too. Flowering tree in full bloom - fuschia set against the orchery painted wall all illuminated to a vibrant shade. So happy, on my usual work&home route, I've taken too much of lonely street lamps. :)

[ Tangible or intangible, always good to take them all out under the sun once in a while. As long as its not going to give me sun burnts, I love sunshiine. :) ]

Dinner Time ~Yaay!!

雨季。

岁末。雨季。
十二月的天，
忽明忽暗。
有时忽冷忽热。
大部分的时间，
空气都是潮湿的。
多么愚昧的季节。
画上休止符时，
最后的记忆是
遗忘。

[ 雨，怎么
越下越大… ］

Seek.

... to be inspired again.

There are times in life when I'm just lost.
Lost of words to feel, to reason, to think.
not even to fantasize, to imagine, to dream.
And now is perhaps the time.
Turmoil within the calm? I'm not sure.
I had so much that i wanted to express but I soon realised I've lost every bit of imagination I've got.
My brain & my mouth & my limbs are not in sync.
These days, or perhaps weeks of being ill, I tried to line my thoughts up but in vain.
The problem is, I could not focus. Must be the pills, I managed to reason.
They are dulling me.
They are wearing me away.
God, where is the real me hiding?
I cannot tolerate the colours desaturating around me,
and the flavours dissolving in all the dishes that I taste.


These days will end soon isn't it?
~10dec'05~

[ Senses are finally recovering! I will get well soon. ]

The Sky is PINK.

夜深了，
突然下起了大雨。
夜空呈现粉红色。
有一种既哀伤又美丽的姿态。
我舍不得睡，
躺在床上静静地观察。
划过天际的闪电像聚光灯般，
拍摄着我苍白的表情。
一幕一幕…

[ 我已记不清终点在哪里。]

Funny MV.

HAHAHA..
Just for LAUGHS :P



[ Enjoy like I did :D ]